My fingers are stuck and my mind is on repeat. Grad school has me doubting myself. My syntax is whack. My vocabulary is shoddy, my intellect is similar to that of a third grader. Seriously, a third grader. I can explain to people what this paper is supposed to be about. I can write it on a tablet. When it comes to typing–even editing– I become a MORON. I can’t. I just can’t. I have a headache. I get sidetracked. I’m overly anxious. This isn’t good. I’m not okay.
I’m so stressed by this whole situation. No wonder I couldn’t function in a relationship. I don’t even like me like this. How is anyone else supposed to like me? How am I supposed to like anyone else? I’m at my own pity party with streamers, noise makers, a stomach full of vodka, and a mouth full of cake. I’m in no shape to be apart of the world. I just want to hideaway until grad school is done.
I’m seriously rethinking my PhD. I want a Masters degree. Nothing about that has changed. But, I don’t know if the price of “Dr.” is worth the cost.
If anyone out there has ever been to grad school and has anything to share I’d love to hear it. Anything, seriously.